The "Real" Episode 3: Its ok to softly close a door, to make room for others to open, right?

Ok, so if there is one HUGE thing I have learned in this last year of newfound single"dumb", its that a door slammed shut, and a million opened up. When I say that door slammed, I mean it rattled the house....closed. Done. Finite. No Mas. But, then there were little angels singing (also known as my family, friends, and therapist), and their song sang "YOOOOOU Aaare GOOOOING TOOOOO BEEEEEE OOOOKKKKK!!!!" It was in 8 part harmony (I'm not sure if that is possible), and there was even a little hip hop exerpt....so cool. But, I digress.

I felt a little suffocated by my own panic for the future, at first. A little trip to Hawaii, helped that (Thanks Mikey). Because, lets face it, if we could all melt our biggest problems away with a trip to Hawaii with a lifelong friend (I think we are going on 17years?), this world would be a much more relaxed and tan place. It was luck and timing all rolled into one.

 (Aren't we precious...we needed a seperate closet for his scarves...)

Ok, so back to the initial panic moment... when I called my BF, Carissa, to tell her that my marriage was ending, through my hysterics, I asked her if I could borrow her children, in case I didn't get the opportunity to have my own. Oddly, she jumped at the idea. So all these questions popped into my head... Will I meet someone else? Will I get to have kids? What happens next? What will happen with Clayton (my step-son from the marriage...FYI)? Dating?? Really?? I hated dating!  The answer was simple...DAWN, JUST BREATHE!!!!

(They are so cute...Why would she want to give them away???)

 So, breathing, hmmm....Well, it turns out we all do it naturally. Apparently, it isn't really that hard. Self discovery, being in one's own body is not something we humans do well, but I'm learning that taking a moment to breathe, noticeably, can add 1 moment of stress reducing clarity into my life. Sometimes, I will even breathe for 5 moments. What can I say? I am a rebel.

 I am a firm believer that we can establish our own destiny. That can be a fine scope to a broad spectrum destiny. You can look in the mirror in the morning and see every fat roll, wrinkle, weird hair that wasn't there yesterday, because we all do it. BUT, what if we all looked in the mirror just once a day and said, "You are amazing! And here is why....." (fill in the blanks...Mad Libs, of sorts)??? Fake it until you make it? Maybe. But when I put on a smile on a day that doesn't really deserve a smile, I feel better. That is my destiny for that day. I will smile and crack jokes so you smile...I will fake it until I make it.

(Isn't it beautiful? My amazing and beautiful friend, Amy, found this and took a picture...it is now my lock screen picture on my phone) 

 I am still figuring out what I want my destiny to be. That is why I keep opening doors. I can be kind of a "yes-woman", of sorts sometimes (exhausting). I recently came to the conclusion that not all doors need to be slammed shut, but rather, just a soft close. Lets just tuck it away, in the back of that filing cabinet in our brains. Its a great little filing cabinet because you might never need to access it, but its there just in case. If I can softly close doors, then I can clear my brain of all the nonsense crap that isn't worth the energy at this particular moment. Though, there is plenty of other rambling crap that moves right in...DAMN OSMOSIS!

( Isn't this door grreeat?! Look where the knob is? I took this pic in WONDERFUL Ireland)

So, on this road to self discovery/destiny seeking/door-opening awesomeness, I am learning to be amazing, as I define it. That is the sum of it all.  Now its your turn, go open some doors and be amazing this week!!!

GO SUPERBOWL COMMERCIALS!!!!

(P.S.....I was in a peptalk kind of mood this week, more for me than you, but I hope you benefitted from it as well...BRING ON THE WEEK!!!!)

(Breathe)