Episode 3: Ah, the Joys of Social Media

Remember, MySpace? Yeah, me neither, really.

  I would have thought that the creator of a social media website would have been a woman. How many men do you know are sitting at home thinking about facebook stalking their ex, or their new crush, or their old college roommate, or the girl they lost their virginity to, or their....well the list goes on, doesn't it? I mean we women openly discuss our tendency to facebook stalk. In fact, we like it, we like it a lot! Don't lie, girlfriends, you were stalking your high school rival when you saw my blog pop up and decided to stalk me instead. Its fine. Stalk me. I like it.

 And it goes so far beyond the fun of stalking, you can spend hours and hours of mindless excitement building gardens, and raising farms, and popping bejeweled gems or playing poker. Who needs a clean house or exercise ANYWAY!!! (Speaking from personal experience only, no judgements, I swear)

 We can show off our photography, our artwork, and our beautiful and talented kids (or cats). That truely is awesome.

  We can make public political statements, post funny pictures that we've swiped from other people, get some great insight into what makes those people that we know currently, or knew at one point in time, tick, and walk hand in hand with people as they share everything from the birth of their child, their latest vacation, or the new miniskirt that they bought that day (ICK! ACK! YUK!). What an awesome forum. You can now know where I am at every moment of my life!!!! LUCKY YOU!!!

  Its about seeing a video on youtube and being able to immediately post it to a friends wall, so you don't have to wait until they come to your house and watch it on your VHS....wait...DO YOU STILL HAVE A VHS???

 I love inspired posts, with intention, quotes, and humor. I love positivity and self promotion. I love excitement for what is happening today and pride in your life.

  What I don't appreciate about social media is when people use it for evil. This technology really is a superpower that should not be abused. I dislike the cryptic messages spouting anger and frustration about a person. I mean, you posted it so that person would see it, right? What ever happened to saying, "Hey, lets have a conversation about this problem. We can work it out in privacy." NO NO NO....instead it is pissing and moaning....WAAAAAAAH! I get it, though. I've been there. It is hard to avoid, plus the support and sympathy is really nice. I think there is always a funny and tactful way to post about your frustrations, though, I did learn this over time. If you can't do it, someone out there said "If you can't say anything nice, don't say it at all." (I should probably be a quieter person...)

 I also HATE (HATE HATE HATE) the misspelled, text speak posts. BAH! HATE!!!!! Thats all.

What about when you want to delete a "friend" but you are scared of confrontation? You're tired of reading about their 500mile run in detail, how many reps they did at the gym, that their big toe has grown another 0.34cm, that they want to beat the *&$@^ out of that @&#%*, or they stole your most recent heartthrob and you think "HATE" everytime they post something....well, Facebook has a solution!!!! YAY! You can UNSUBSCRIBE??!!!!! Its like deleting them, but you aren't. This means you can occasionally stalk, but you don't have to see all 867 self portrait pictures they just posted in a matter of minutes, which makes you openly growl at your computer/ipad/Kindle fire. The stalking is on your terms. Novel idea.

All of a sudden it occurred to me, we have "Big Brother'd" ourselves. We saved the government from a lot of work.

Thank you. Mark Zuckerberg.

 I love Facebook. It keeps me in touch, and gives me a voice. I will continue to try to use it for good and not evil.

Everyone have a safe and wonderful weekend! I am taking Bambi and Ricardo to the OC to visit Trixie...This might lead to another post over the weekend, we will see.

Episode 1, part deux: I have a disease....

Well, that got your attention didn't it???? You people are nosey.

 I only suffer from a disease that many of us suffer from at some point in our lives, if not for the duration. If you don't then you are missing a valuable life lesson. It isn't contagious, don't worry. symptoms include: intermittent flushing/diaphoresis, the urge to growl, tourettes type outbursts, the urge to start typing in all capitols, followed by possible paranoia, tears, and the need to incessantly apologize for your behavior.

What is this madness, you are asking yourself....has Dawn become Miss Hyde to her Jekyll, RN?

Diagnosis: FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE: a disease in which a person speaks before thinking, processing, and formulating a reasonable response to another person's communication (be it in conversation, email, facebook or texting).

Other terms for this Disease: DIARRHEA OF THE MOUTH; IMPATIENT RESPONSE SYNDROME; and POST-RESPONSE REGRET ANXIETY DISORDER.

See, my form of this disease is not, usually, in verbal conversation. If it happens, I can recognize it quite quickly. MY strain is of the email/facebook/texting persuasion.

I think this is the worst type of the disease because it is so easy to hit "Reply" and start typing furiously, and it sounds soooo good in my head, and I put a lot of commas, and capitols, and exclamation points and question marks.....Then I, merely, press the "send" button and off it goes!

THEN THE PROOF READING HAPPENS! You go back and read the original email, and BOOM! The rest of it has loaded onto your phone, and you missed a huge important part, which, basically, makes you look like a lunatic....so, then the panic sets in, and you wait....contemplating how you can make it better....Send another email? Wait to see the response? OOOOHHHHH! What to do......

The solution is simple. BACKPEDAL!!!!!! APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY! Offer up your first born child/cat/roommate?

 In the end I have learned, just own up to your mistakes and gently remind the person you are human. So, to all of you who have ever had this disease, just know that there is no cure, but there is a treatment: Humility, the ability to apologize, and maybe laughing about it a little....and you will be just fine.

Believe me. I had to do it this morning. Woops.

Episode 1: I'm "OK," No, seriously, I am.

I have tossed around the idea of writing a "Blog" many times over the last year. But, what to write about? My travels, my jobs, my family, my thoughts on life and how facebook plays a role, my cat? I got a beautiful response from my New Years Post, so I decided that my stories should be written. Well, actually, my friend and co-worker, said "you should write a blog." And, since I had been thinking about it already, that was just the push I needed.

WRITERS NOTE: This blog is merely my thoughts, stories, and adventures. Sometimes, names will be changed, sometimes not (it depends on if I will get in trouble or not), but mostly, I crack myself up, and I would like to make you laugh. But warning, sometimes I get serious and sad and irritated. I will try to make those times funny too. Feedback is always welcome. And, I also welcome suggestions on what you would like me to write about. An improv, of sorts.

I spend a lot of time in my car, and very often it is where I do a lot of my mental processing: What did she mean by that? I should work out, but I don't want to, but I like the way I feel after, ok, I guess I will go; To be a Weight Watcher or Not to be a Weight Watcher (again); Is he going to call? Where should I go on my next adventure? I should take a cooking class! I should take a dance class! I need coffee. I wonder if I should cook tonight, or get take out. Crap, I'm late again! What will I have to lecture my parents about next? Should I try online dating, but my personality is just so much better in person and not on a profile.....really, the list goes on on...

  One thing for today's post, since it was kind of just a warm up session, DOES ANYONE ELSE THINK IN STATUS UPDATES FOR FACEBOOK??? See, this is why this blog will be good for me. Because, on any given day, I have performed mental status updates for FB about 60 times. My actual posts might only be as many as 10, depending on what I am doing during the day. But, mentally, I am doing so much more.
  So then I start to think, is that where we are headed? Will I have to start watching my thoughts because WiFi will be, somehow, hooked to my, naturally snarky, brain, and I will be constantly offending people? The future is scary. But, I'll be OK. No, seriously, I will be.

XOXO